But by far, the venue for Taiwanglish that has most vigorously grabbed my imagination is the canvas of dirty, beat-up, ever-present motor scooters that populate every Taiwanese street. Almost every scooter has a slogan, in very questionable English, either on its front faring, its side haunch, or both, ranging from the mundane to the cutesy to the modest to the entirely undecipherable...

	Cabin: With Fashionable Feeling
	Duke: This Is a New Concept for Creative Your Life
	Fever: You Got to Feel the Happiness of Riding
	The Friendly Scooter on Earth
	The Friendle Scooten on Earon
	The New Generational Scooter Fron Earth
	No One in the World Can Be My Best Partner Except the Zippy Difa Duke Dio Tact for New Generation [very rare!]
	Duke: New Generation New Colour New Model: The Best Function & Sensation I Have
	My BuBu
	Melody 50: Lady's Follower
	Fac Ax: The Super Start on Sunny
	Jog Is Fascinating to You
	Going 50: Kymco Brings Out the Genius in Your Choice
	Dream 100: All I Have Giving You the Best Function
	We Reach for the Sky: Neither Does Civilization
	Going 50: A Scooter You Can Live With
	Super Computer Access Powered by Blitz
	Cabin: Sparkling Scooter
	Shuttle in the City Jengle: The New Speedy Super Snail Clan

The Taiwanese are an intelligent lot, however, and English proficiency among the populace is growing, so it was only a matter of time before distributors got hip to the joke and began to put things right. Most newer models have either a succinct, grammatical, idiomatic English slogan or none at all. The most egregiously poor translations — and thus, the funniest ones — are getting harder and harder to find as newer models proliferate.

Lately I've found new fascination in hunting for new bizarre slogans among the literally hundreds of parked scooters that I can easily observe on my daily commute. It is a mathematical certainty that upon venturing into any given Taiwanese neighborhood one will see more scooters (parked and mobile) than humans.

Hunting today for scooter slogans completely transformed my walk to and from work,the only thing that mattered was to find even weirder wording...